Job Of The Day: Custom Wedding Hashtag Scribe

Would you pay for this?

Here is a job that I didn’t even think was a job, but when you think about it, everything is a job, so I guess this is all full circle and here we are.

If you’re getting married anytime soon and have thought at any point during the planning process that you need a wedding hashtag and can’t be bothered to come up with one on your own, there’s a service that will take care of that for you.

You Can Now Pay Someone to Make You a Custom Wedding Hashtag

Happily Ever Hashtagged is the brainchild of Marielle Wakim, an arts and culture editor at Los Angeles magazine and funnily enough, the woman who first ‘grammed the Whole Foods asparagus water that got everyone’s panties in a bunch not too long ago.

She started the service for the reason anyone starts a service: she saw a need and realized that she had the exact qualifications to fill it.

After attending nearly 20 weddings over the past couple of years and being the go-to person asked to create hashtags for several of her friends, she realized this was something she could monetize. “This is either the best idea or the dumbest idea I’ve ever had,” Wakim jokes

One custom wedding hashtag will cost you $40. Three hashtags will run you $85. And, if you want to really go all out, a hashtag for your respective bachelorette/bachelor parties and your wedding will cost you a cool $115. If you look at this kind of work as very specialized copywriting, that’s reasonable. But, it’s also a ridiculous thing to pay for when you can happily harass your friends to come up with something just as zippy and cute for free.

Considering how expensive the other components of a wedding can be, it seems like this might be the kind of thing a harried couple who really, really wanted a wedding hashtag would reasonably consider. When I asked a recently-married friend if she would’ve paid for this service at her non-hashtagged wedding, she said “Fuck no. I bled money for a year because nothing is reasonable for weddings, so it does pale in comparison, but also, it never would have been a priority.”

It feels easy to point a finger and cackle at Wakim, but she’s smart for realizing that there’s a “need” for this and getting hers. It’s fine if you want a hashtag for your wedding and it’s fine if you decide to pay someone to do that, I guess. A wedding hashtag seems like something both trivial and extremely important; if you’re in the throes of planning a wedding and want to avoid thinking about something way more important like whether or not you can seat your Aunt Martha next to your fiancé’s drunk cousin, fixating on this tiny task seems like a good way of deflection, if anything. If it serves as a temporary distraction from the other, larger tasks looming on the horizon, than maybe it’s worth it.

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