Is It All Happening? (It’s Not All Happening)

Sometimes I like to get doom-and-gloomy and endtimes-y. It’s fun! This is is pretty clearly a coping mechanism for not dealing with my own problems — I mean, really, it’s really hard to get excited or devastated about a massive amount of credit card debt when you think The World Is Ending. It’s also a great antidote to ho-hum feelings of inadequacy and a failure to embrace life, accomplish things. But I also recognize that everyone in the history of the world has felt like this at one time or another. If the END is the grand finale, of course we all think we’re going to be stars of the show. Every generation of dinosaurs was probably, like, “God, it’s OVER.” And only one of them ended up being right! All that wasted energy.

Anyway I spent some time last night on my favorite hobby, which is: Thinking about all the ways things could get real (ways things could get real: floods, collapse of world economy, nuclear war, massive famine, plague, really the only limit is your imagination!), and maybe I should, I don’t know, own a flashlight, or keep some bottles of water in my closet, something. Iodine pills? A sleeping bag? A map of the city that isn’t my phone?

And then I woke up and read this article in Der Spiegel. You dont really need to read it, just know that the article is filed under “Euro Crisis,” the kicker is “Currency’s Days Feared Numbered,” and the title is “Investors Prepare for Euro Collapse.” In my head: This is the beginning! This is IT. I called my dad. I woke him up. “Is the Euro going to collapse and stimulate the fall of the world economy and, in turn, the fall of man?” This was a serious question. “No,” he said.

Society lives to see another day. DRAT.

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