Tackle Your To-Do List This Weekend

This is your to-do list:

If it’s sunny where you live: Go outside. Take a walk. Sit in a park. Listen to music or don’t listen to music. Eat a popsicle or eat an apple (and then throw the core in a bush — this is a really great joy). Get some sun on your cheeks. Smell some flowers. Smile at people and try to get them to smile back.

If it’s not nice where you live: Go outside anyway. A little rain never hurt anyone. Neither did cold. Put on boots. Wear a jacket. The sun will probably come out eventually, and you can use its appearance as evidence that you’re in the right place and everything is going to be okay, etc. If it doesn’t come out, don’t sweat it. It means nothing. Stop with your magical thinking.

If you can’t bear to leave the house: Watch a thing. Watch a thing that will make you happy. Watch Broken English. It’s actually about a depressed Parker Posey, but it’s really lovely and she has great clothes and also there is a very attractive French man in it. The ending is hopeful. Almost Famous is another good option. Who doesn’t love Almost Famous? (If you don’t love Almost Famous, I don’t understand, and I don’t want to understand.) You can also read a book, if you’d like. I recommend The Dud Avocado, but just pick something out of your to-read pile.

On Sunday, call your mother, if that’s an option for you. If you didn’t send her anything, don’t apologize. Don’t say you ran out of time or forgot or meant to and just didn’t. Definitely don’t say it’s in the mail if it isn’t in the mail. Call your mom and thank her for being your mom, and tell her you love her. That’s enough. That’s all she wants anyway. (I know this because my mom told me this once, and she speaks for all moms, everywhere.)

If you have any work or chores to do, don’t even think about them until Sunday night. Screw that stuff. You’ve got more important things to do.

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