Cutting Back In Tiny, Tiny Ways

by Laura Chanoux

Occasionally I realize that my checking account has less money in it than I had anticipated. Maybe a dinner out was more than I expected or meeting a friend for a beer turned into a few cocktails. After those spending hangovers, I find myself skipping really dumb things on my shopping list to conserve funds / as penance. For example:

Cotton balls: I ran out of cotton balls at least six months ago. I only use them when I’ve worn enough eye makeup to need remover or when I’m taking off nail polish. These are tasks that can be completed with tissues and toilet paper, right? This definitely never ends with my eyeliner smeared across my cheekbones and four tissues in the trash.

Actual savings: $2.69 or 22% of a fancy drink

Oatmeal: I rarely get up early enough to both look presentable and eat breakfast. I buy instant oatmeal packets to bring into the office and eat before my 9:00 AM staff meeting. Once the box runs out, though, I keep debating whether it’s worth picking up another. Shouldn’t I be eating avocado toast anyway? Or something with chia seeds? Maybe there will be free bagels by the office mailboxes again.

Actual savings: $3.50 or 25% of a movie ticket

Shoes: My go-to black flats are starting to wear out and would not be that expensive to replace. However, wearing my black three-inch pumps doesn’t cost me anything — except maybe long-term ankle problems, but that’s for Future Laura to deal with. Plus, the pumps let me look almost eye-to-eye with the extremely tall men I work with and tower over the rest of the office. It’s win-win.

Actual savings: $30 or one brunch

Dry cleaning: I have a blazer and a couple of dresses that can’t be washed properly at home. When they get to the point of needing a cleaning, they live on my dresser for at least a week before I give in and accept that my next presentation demands a jacket. My mother’s lesson to always check the washing instructions before buying new clothes has overall served me well, though the apartment building driers that shrunk my husband’s shirts have not.

Actual savings: $13.50 at the dry cleaner down the street or one martini. I have no sense of what dry cleaning should cost, so maybe I’m getting overcharged.

Laundry: On a related note, I delay picking up the $10 in quarters for our building’s laundry machines until I am completely out of socks. It takes so many quarters and sandal season is finally here, so …

Actual savings: $3 per load or 8 ounces of local beer

Lunch with coworkers: My colleagues stop by my office once or twice a week to see if I want to join them for burgers/breakfast food/burritos/wings. I enjoy spending time with them, but a breakfast sandwich and a cup of coffee adds up. I typically bring lunch and after a big weekend I’m less willing to leave it in our fridge to head out for a group meal.

Actual savings: Roughly $12 depending on the place or 33% of a restaurant week menu before drinks, tax, and tip

Fancy coffee: How can I justify a sweet, smooth mocha with a leaf drizzled in the foam? I should be drinking black coffee: dark, bitter, and two dollars cheaper. Maybe I could put those two dollars towards cotton balls.

Actual savings: $2.50 or 6.5% of a concert ticket in Wicker Park

Laura Chanoux works in higher education in Chicago and is 5’11” in heels.

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