1 More Chance to Do That 1 Thing

Thursday is a great day to do that 1 thing you don’t want to do but also don’t want to continue thinking about doing.

Last week I didnt do 1 thing so I didn’t post about 1 thing. Maybe you did 1 thing? Today’s 1 thing is actually 2 things, or maybe actually 0 things, because both of them are things I already said I did but didn’t actually do. But now I’ve done them. Last night I called and actually cancelled my J.Crew card and also my AmEx card. They’ve been paid off for awhile (“awhile”=five months and two months). Now no longer exist. Feels good, feels great.

To cancel the AmEx card I had to talk to a human, but he just let me cancel it and didn’t try to fight back. It took 7 minutes. For the J.Crew card, I didn’t even have to talk to a human. It took 2 minutes. Why put off a collective 9 minutes of phone time so long?

Let’s start with J.Crew. The reason that I didn’t cancel it before: Emergencies. Which I know. That sounds ridiculous. But I can imagine several scenarios in which having access to $1,000 worth of J.Crew merchandise would be necessary and important and possibly a life saver. FOR EXAMPLE, what if I witness a murder and the murderer knows that I witnessed the murder and I’m on the run from the murderer. I could pop into J.Crew, pick out a whole new outfit and CHANGE MY LOOK and then the murderer would never find me. I could even go to the sale rack and maybe get like, 3 outfits, and then I could disappear forever. See. OR what if I am out in the world and about to have a Very Important Meeting Like Maybe the Most Important Meeting of My Life and something terrible happens — I don’t know, maybe I bleed all over myself???!?!? Maybe I have to help someone who has bled all over themselves? Maybe I get splashed by a car/puddle situation?

But what I decided last night was that if it was an Actual Real Life Emergency that I could steal before I could die. That sounds stupid. But. If a murderer was really after me and I felt that the only way for me to survive was to change my outfit, I could and should go to Forever 21 and put on a new outfit and walk out of there and that I’d feel fine about it because: Life or Death.

I didn’t cancel the AmEx before because I was lazy. But now it’s done. Two down. Really, actually, cross my heart. Four to go.

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