Okay So the Arctic Is Melting But AT LEAST There’s Oil

The New York Times has an article about the landgrab that is happening as Arctic ice melts and makes way for DRILLING FOR OIL. And MINERALS. WOWZA!! The Earth provides!!!1

In the midst of this very exciting development, the NYT offers a small interruption to the program already in progress to mention, quite casually, that, “At current rates, Arctic waters could be ice-free in summer by the end of the decade, scientists say.” You know, that’s a thing scientists say. Those scientists, always saying things.

The paper of record goes on to quote one of these scientists. “’Things are happening much faster than what any scientific model predicted,’ said Dr. Morten Rasch, who runs the Greenland Ecosystem Monitoring program at Aarhus University in Denmark.” Oh but I’ve never heard of that scientist. Where are the American scientists, hmm? Couldn’t find an American scientist, NYT? Must be rubbish. Not to be believed! TELL ME MORE ABOUT THE OIL, PLEASE.

Happily, says the NYT. Back to regularly scheduled programming. Back to talking about which countries are going to have shipping ports at the end of the world. So very important. So very important.

P.S. Fire tornadoes exist okay bye

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