New Perspectives on Negotiation
How to think differently about asking for more
Many of us, by this point, know the basics of negotiating.
- Be pleasant but firm, not too adversarial or too accommodating.
- Know your worth.
- Don’t make threats you’re not willing to carry out.
We even know some of the advanced-level stuff.
- Don’t negotiate against yourself.
- Don’t talk too much.
- Think about yourself as part of a unit, like a family; remember that you’re working on its behalf and not merely your own.
- Be aware of, and use, what leverage you have.
- Really, seriously, don’t talk too much.
But there’s more to the importance of negotiation, and to making negotiation work for you, than that, as this Future of Money piece by Robert Park points out.
most problems at work can be solved by negotiation. You have to learn how to negotiate; you have to learn how to negotiate well — and then you have to do it. …
The goal in salary negotiation is not to get the highest offer. It’s to get the best offer without compromising your relationship with the employer.
Negotiation Isn’t Just About Money
Park makes some good suggestions, and so does Marie Elizabeth Oliver over at Marie Claire, who spoke to an expert about ways to reframe negotiations so that they seem less intimidating, and so that you realize you’re already good at what you’re setting out to do.
You’re actually great at getting what you want. The real problem, [expert Lelia Gowland] says, isn’t that women aren’t good at negotiating — it’s that we just don’t recognize it. You’re actually successfully negotiating constantly throughout the day, from making dinner plans to arranging a weekend with friends. “We should be looking at negotiation like that: not as an obstacle course that there’s only one right way to complete, but as an organic conversation.”
You’re Better at Negotiating Than You Think You Are
It’s true that if you think of negotiation that way, you may well realize that you’re already pretty experienced. On an everyday basis, you put in a lot of the practice that you need to succeed.
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