A Different, But Related, Kind of Bucket List

Friday chatting about money buckets, what we spend on joy, and more

ESTER: Happy Friday! Or not-so-happy Friday, terrifying, miserable Friday, frankly, but here we are anyway.

NICOLE: This whole week has been full of devastating news. Worse than that, a sort of devastating sense that this is not the kind of world we want to live in. But yes, here we are.

ESTER: Do you want to do a thing where we each put forward one of the heartbreaking things we’re reading right now and then go on to talk about something more Billfold-y? Because right now I’m losing it over this piece in TeenVogue.

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After I am killed, I will then be crucified on TV screens and laptops and iPhones all over the world. People on Facebook will presume I must have done something to antagonize the officer, because surely the video that shows me being defenselessly gunned down “isn’t the whole story.” I will be rendered unable to defend myself as the media will evade the hundreds of Instagram photos and Facebook pictures where I am smiling or happy and find the one where I happen to be grimacing, or look “scary.” They will use that photo for wordless proof as to why I should be dead, because this is what people who deserve to die look like.

NICOLE: That is heartbreaking. And so true. I’ve got Ijeoma Oluo’s series of tweets advocating action in my open tabs, and later today I need to go through them and pull out the actions I can take right now and the ones I need to think about in the future.

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ESTER: Yes, Ijeoma Oluo is great, and I would take any advice she dishes out very seriously.

NICOLE: So. Something more Billfold-y. This week we talked a lot about what to do with our “extra” money, after we’ve earned enough to get by. Like … retirement? Debt? Home ownership? Charity? All of the above?

ESTER: My financial advisor lady told us to conceive of our money in three buckets. There’s the first bucket, which is ideally full enough to handle six months or so of life, should emergency strike. There’s the last bucket, which is for retirement. And then there’s the middle bucket, which is general saving, and that, it seems like, is what we’re talking about. What to do once you’ve filled up Bucket #1 and you’re doing pretty well with Bucket #3.

NICOLE: But is Bucket #3 ever really full? Not to spoil some of the pieces we’ve got coming next week, but that’s one of the questions we’re going to look at on Monday. (It’s a really great feature, y’all.) How do you know when you have enough money for “the rest of your life?”

I guess I feel like that middle bucket should be poised over the third bucket just in case. But you can’t really figure out what you’re going to need 30+ years from now (and for the maybe 20 years after that).

ESTER: It’s funny, because I have a tends-towards-worrying disposition, but I find myself thinking more about Bucket #2 than Bucket #3, and when I saw that your response to, “What should I do now?” was “I guess add more to my Retirement bucket,” I wanted to reach through the screen and say, “Wait! Wait!”

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Bucket #2 is for vacations and concerts, travel and food, charity and general generosity. Bucket #2 is for joy *today*, or joy tomorrow, anyway, for things that feed us, literally and spiritually. We are none of guaranteed the next 30 years, let alone the 20 that follow. See above, right? We shouldn’t skimp on Bucket #2 just because Bucket #3 exists.

In my case, Bucket #2 is also what Ben and I are drawing on during this period where we have small children and more bills to pay than income with which to pay them. Bucket #2 is what is enabling neither of us to work a job we hate just for the money — for now, anyway. I am very, very grateful for Bucket #2.

NICOLE: I want to put more money towards charity — like, right now, I’m putting about 2 percent of my income towards charity and crowdfunding, and I want to increase that — but I don’t feel like I’m lacking in the vacations and concerts and travel aspect of my life. I think I already built a lot of that into my budget, and sure, the travel is often business-related, but that is one of the benefits of being a freelancer who can perform readings of short fiction or whatever. So spending more on others would satisfy me. Spending a smidge more on myself might work. But I don’t feel like my Bucket #2 is empty, if it’s the joy bucket. I have a lot of joy in my life, and I’m very grateful for it.

ESTER: I know that, really. You’re good at taking care of the Wants as well as the Needs. I just had a momentary stutter reaction, I guess, and I was also thinking about the advice in a general way. I think funding retirement accounts is a great idea! It just shouldn’t be done at the expense of the now. Everyone’s saving and spending priorities are different, of course. But in your case, I think I would be saving up in Bucket #2 to take a couple of weeks off and go to a residency to revise the novel. Because cabins are good but residencies are amazing — I’ve met such important people while chatting about our work over cereal at breakfast, and I’ve gotten so much done.

NICOLE: That is one of the things I’m thinking about. Like, right now my freelancing momentum is on a significant upward curve, and I don’t want to jump out of that. Next year there might be a lull. But yeah, at some point, do I take a few weeks off and go invest in the “other half” of my career? And if I do, it’s wise to have money saved to make up for the lack of income.

ESTER: Yeah, absolutely. Whether it’s for now or farther down the road, what money really buys is freedom. The best gift anyone has given me lately is babysitting: my father-in-law, very generously, has been paying someone to play with one or both of the kids for a few hours on the weekends so that Ben and I can get things done, and it’s like heaven. Like getting a little bit of a real weekend again, despite being a parent.

And FWIW, I think you can take off a couple of weeks without losing momentum. No one’s going to forget about you — especially not when you’ve made yourself known the way you have as being capable and professional and impressive. That’s the nice thing about accruing credit: you get to spend a little of it. I mean, you know your situation better than anyone, and I don’t mean to tell you your business. My only point is to be encouraging. You Can Do It and all that, because you can.

NICOLE: Awwwww, thank you. *blushes*

Also, startup idea: an app where you can buy babysitting hours for your friends. Does this already exist? If it doesn’t, maybe one of our readers can make it happen and become a tech millionaire. (Because the app would take 1.5 percent of all financial transactions, of course.)

ESTER: Like MealTrain, only for sitters. It’s a no-brainer. I’m sure someone could make it happen.

NICOLE: You could call it… wait for it… The Baby-Sitters Club.

ESTER: You know you’re totally Kristy, right? Maybe part Mary Anne.

NICOLE: I am nothing if not full of Great Ideas.

ESTER: Kristy should have ended up in the Pacific Northwest, freelancing from her own small, well-appointed apartment.

NICOLE: I feel like we should end by reminding newer Billfolders that we have a whole series about this.

How the Baby-Sitters Club Does Money: Kristy

If they need non-stressful finance-related entertainment in their lives today, that’s a good link to click.

ESTER: I’m going to re-read them myself. By the way, the book I was queried about maybe writing has to do with Harry Potter.

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NICOLE: That is incredible.

ESTER: I know! That’s one the reasons it’s so tempting, even if it doesn’t turn out to be financially viable.

NICOLE: Well, I think we have a bunch of stories in the archive about how to negotiate. We might even have written a few. I hope it goes well!

ESTER: Thank you. I will keep everyone updated, because of course I will.

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