The Cost of Buying Emergency Shorts
It’s 88 degrees in Seattle and I’m wearing long pants in an unairconditioned apartment.
It is 88 degrees in Seattle as I write this. Eighty-eight degrees in the first week of May.
Seattle is not used to these kinds of temperatures—culturally, we’ve barely started to comprehend the idea that global climate change means our climates may change too, it’s not all rising sea levels and melting ice caps—and we’re very not used to the idea that it’s going to get even hotter in a month or so.
One Hundred Bucks and a Mission to Beat the Summer Heat
Some of us deal with the heat by installing air conditioning and temporarily moving into a hotel.
I dealt with the heat—and my southern-facing windows—by buying $10 emergency shorts.
Why are these “emergency shorts?” Because I wanted them as fast as possible—I was seriously considering Amazon Priming myself some clothes—and because when Old Navy dropped the “Flash Sale: 50% Off Shorts” email in my inbox I decided to treat this like an emergency. Buy half-price shorts now, before everyone else grabs the ones in your size. Hoard those cheap shorts for the months to come!
(These are also “emergency shorts” because it sounds better than “impulse buy shorts.” I’m not being impulsive, I am dealing with an emerging heat-related situation!)
You might ask why I don’t wear the shorts I already own. The answer is that I don’t own any. My summer wardrobe is, at this point: one wrap skirt, one floral skirt that I bought in high school that fits just often enough that I keep it around, and a handful of sundresses. But I have plenty of T-shirts and tank tops, thanks to that “tanks for $3, tees for $5” sale I told you about in March, and I figured it would be a smarter move, in terms of clothing longevity, to snag the $10 emergency shorts and pair them with the tees and tanks instead of wearing the sundresses every day.
I’ve never been a huge shorts person, honestly; it’s always been easier to put on a skirt or a dress than deal with the whole “when I sit down, are these shorts going to ride up into my thigh joints?” question. But I am ready to give shorts another try, thanks to Old Navy’s 50 percent discount, plus another 40 percent if I use the TREAT code, plus free two-day shipping if my base cart (before discounts) totaled at least $50.
So how much did I spend to get those $10 emergency shorts? $48.97. That got me:
- 1 pair $10 denim shorts
- 1 pair $12.50 linen shorts
- 1 $16.97 denim skirt
- 1 $20.00 drawstring capri pants
Here’s why I love Old Navy so much: the cost without buying the capri pants (but with all of the applicable discount codes) was $43.49. Adding the $20 capris to my order tripped the free two-day shipping discount, which brought the order to $48.97. I got a whole new pair of summer pants for $5.48! I will probably have to re-hem them myself, because “capri pants” tend to hit my ankle, but they’re still five bucks!
Also, I got my emergency shorts—and thanks to that free shipping, they’ll be here on Thursday. Bring it, southern-facing windows. I’ll see you in my short pants.
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