Winter Sports, Ski Tags, and Baby Leather Jackets

by Mike Dang and Logan Sachon

Logan: Mike! Have you been following the #sochi coverage so far?

Mike: Not really. Just the part where reporters talk about how their hotel rooms are falling apart. But I have seen photos of the opening ceremony and it looks like there is a lot of fun going on. You?

Logan: No I’m boycotting watching them because Heidi Moore told me to and also I don’t have a TV. Did you know? There are so many reasons to, I can’t even tell you, just read her column. Though I will be partaking in some FIGURE SKATING GIFS. Everybody loves a figure skating gif. Do you like figure skating? Is that even a question?

Mike: I am more of a Summer Olympics person, but I definitely recall rooting for Michelle Kwan and feeling bad for her for not getting the Gold. And the last time the Winter Olympics were here, one of my friends was doing a story about Johnny Weir, so I was aware of him competing! Also, the whole Nancy/Tonya thing.

Logan: I remember watching the skating competitions with my mom, but competition really stresses me out. I’m so anxious for everyone and sad when people don’t win, but figure skating is so beautiful that I can get over it. ANYWAY, I never ice skated at all until college, and I remember kind of even then having this suspicion that I’d be really good at it, that I’d just get on the ice and fly, you know, just be so graceful. That, uh, didn’t happen. I’m not a beautiful ice skater. I’m not even passable, really. It was really disappointing.

Mike: I’m not much of a skater either! I can go around without falling and that’s good enough for me.

Logan: Do you do any other winter sports? I know you grew up in SoCal, but there are mountains near there, right? With snow?

Mike: I went snowboarding one time borrowing equipment from some friends. I remember it being not that expensive because of that. But I also remember not being very good and getting super bruised after the day was over. I think my favorite part of the day was going inside when it was dark and chilly and eating good food and drinking good beer. None of my friends are into winter sports? So I haven’t gone in like a decade, but I’m sure I would if a group of us decided to organize something.

Logan: I’ve never been skiing. In high school there was a ski club that went on weekend trips, and it was basically just the popular rich kids, so that’s what I always associated with winter sports. Rich kids getting out of school to go makeout in cabins. Losers. JK I was jealous, I’m sure. Still am! And that’s why I’ve never been skiing. That and the cold. And the money. When I lived in Oregon I went snowshoeing once and it was one of the worst experiences of my life. I mean, I’ve had a great life. But it was pretty terrible. I don’t like being cold. But I do love whiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiining. I think I borrowed snowshoes when I went? I don’t remember.

Mike: I guess we’re not winter sports people! Or really: sports people. I will cheer for all the Americans though, or the athletes with no country.

Logan: You know how sometimes people keep snow lift tags on their coats? That always annoys me. I’m always a little offended by that. It feels like they’re bragging that they ski, and therefore, can afford to ski. Seems rude.

Mike: No, I didn’t know that was a thing! Is that a thing? A class signifier?

Logan: That’s what I think. That’s my personal opinion. Maybe there’s a reason to keep them on your coat. The other day I saw a toddler with a lift tag on his coat. Do you ever look at small children and add up the cost of their clothes and it’s like, more than all the clothes you’ve ever owned have cost you? I think about that sometimes. And the lift tag just adds, I don’t even know, $50 to it? I just Googled it. Okay $50-$80 for day passes. And children under five get in free mostly, so okay. Okay, so the toddler lift tag was not the status symbol I thought it was. But still.

Mike: Hah, I’ve never added up the clothes on a child, though I used to work at a baby store in high school and when we got a shipment of say, little leather jackets, I’d think, “Does the person know that their baby will grow out of this $300 jacket in a month?” But also: “Does the person who can afford a $300 leather jacket for a baby even care?” Otherwise I haven’t really thought about it, or lift tags. But also, if you’re going to a place to ski, won’t everyone have lift tags?

Logan: Oh, I’m talking about like, on the subway. Back in the city. Ha I feel like I’m maybe a little bit obsessed with this. Really expensive baby clothes are also interesting to me. Like, everyone associated with them has to be in on the joke right? Maybe everyone except like, the children that are sewing them. But really. “LOL I’m designing this leather jacket for a baby.” “LOL I’m selling this leather jacket for a baby.” “LOL I’m buying this leather jacket for a baby.” “LOL I’m a baby and I don’t know anything.” Did you ever buy a leather jacket for a baby? At a discount?

Mike: Hah, no, because even after the discount it’s still a lot of money? I’ve usually gone with the registry for baby gifts. Okay, how did we get to the Olympics to me buying baby gifts is what I want to know.

Logan: Haha, sorry I’ve been housebound for a few days and feverish and am kind of loopy. Can I ask you one more question: Are you caught up on the television program Nashville?

Mike: I haven’t seen this week’s episode, but I have seen the other ones, yes!

Logan: I didn’t think any shows came back until the end of February, but I just found out that one started back in the beginning of January, so it’s basically Christmas over here. New TV eps and figure skating gifs. We live in exciting times, Mike Dang!!!!!!

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