WWYD: Moving, Staying Comfortable, and Taking Chances

In this installment of “WWYD,” deciding to stay or deciding to go:

My girlfriend and I rent in a mid-size, industrial city. The median house price is 4.8 times our yearly income (and rising at a steady rate due to a mining/industrial economy). A mutual friend has bought a good little house as a revenue property with his current partner in a desirable area and is looking to rent it out — he asked us if we were interested. While it would be roughly the same price as our current abode, it is more centrally located and is the type of house we’d like to own one day if/when we have a respectable down payment amassed (at least another six years if our car keeps working). We currently live in a post-war inner-ring suburb with freight trains and no sidewalks; I’d love to be able to do all my errands on foot and take the bus to work.

The cons: the basement suite would also be let out, and it is smaller than our current arrangement. Also, I am finding it difficult to face moving costs and just the general hassle of moving (I haven’t moved in 4 years), not to mention having a friend as a Landlord. While this friend is a good friend I have known for a long time, he doesn’t take as long as I do to get used to an idea — hence the impulsive revenue property purchase — and I worry that we could be asked to leave if his plans change. Also, the house is only half in my friend’s name — the other half is in his partner’s name. He’s confident that they will be together for the foreseeable future, though. They do own a house in another part of the city.

On the other hand, he is very conscientious about getting things fixed, and we could fix up and paint the house as desired. Also, did I mention walkable?

Our current situation is with a long-term landlord who owns several properties. He’s decent, although not the best landlord I’ve had, and we have a good history with him. When I move, I like to stay there for at least a couple years. I’m a real homebody and need to have a secure living arrangement.

I’m afraid that we could pass up a possible good thing, but I’m also afraid that we may be jumping into a different pasture just because it looks greener. I’ve told our friend that we’ll talk it over — the house won’t be available till May at the earliest.

I’m reasonably sure I know your answer to this question: Talk to your friend and get them to commit or at least lay out their 5-year-plan, but even then, I’m not sure how stable their 5-year-plan is. (If I’d asked him a year ago, becoming a landlord would not have been on his radar.) I’ve turned up other opportunities because I was too conservative and now I regret them; I hope this isn’t the same. Anyway: WWYD? — H.

I’ve moved a lot while living in the city — it’s just something you get used to doing when you’re young and renting. I don’t like moving for the same reasons H. does: It’s expensive if you’re hiring people to help you move, a hassle if you’re renting a truck and persuading your pals to help you out, and sometimes it’s nice to just stay where you are.

But things change: Roommates come and go or you decide you want to live alone for a while, rents get raised high enough to force you to look for a more affordable place, and terrible experiences with landlords or neighbors convince you to pack up all your things and go. I’ve experienced all of these things and more (and so has everyone else). The point is that life changes in an instant, and you often don’t have control over when it changes. You can talk about five-year plans, but no one knows with 100 percent certainly that things will be as they imagine or hope it will be five years down the line.

I am the kind of person who loves routines. I find comfort in familiarity. When I’m given the opportunity to try something different, I often turn to mentors for advice, and the advice I am often given is: Live a little while you’re still young. Take chances and experience something new. Staying in your comfort zone all the time often leads to regret.

Personally, I would move. Location is important to me, and the ability to do things in a walkable distance would make up for the smaller arrangement. And if things didn’t work out, it’d suck, but I’d just do what I did when things didn’t pan out before: move. Of course, there is another person in this equation who has equal say in this decision: your girlfriend.

Yes, talk to your friend/potential landlord about your concerns and wishes, and talk to your girlfriend about whether or not moving is the right decision. Go through best and worst case scenarios. The best thing that could happen is that you’ll move and you’ll love the new place and location and get to stay a while. The worst case scenario is that you’ll move and discover that the situation is not what you expected it to be and you’ll have to move again. Remember that life changes in an instant and even if you decide to stay where you are, something could happen that may get you to move anyway, but also remember that after weighing your options, deciding to stay is just as good a choice as deciding to pick up and go. Just don’t be afraid to jump into something new.

Email me your WWYD experiences to me with “WWYD” in the subject line. See previous installments. Photo: psmithy

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