My Last Five Hundred Bucks

I read through and carefully considered everyone’s advice about what bed to buy … and then I got overwhelmed so I just went to Ikea and picked something based on nothing.

$229, Sultan Hanestad (full-sized mattress)
Historically the one criteria my mattress had to meet was that it could be stuffed in my car. Now I don’t have a car. I don’t know how I picked this exact one out but I didn’t think about it very hard and I definitely didn’t test it out by lying down on it or else I would have known it was like lying on a table. But: It’s good for the back. (I’ll be buying a memory foam thing.)

$120, Sultan Aram (full-sized bed base)
It’s like a box spring, but it’s $100 cheaper than a box spring. Also like a box spring, it cannot fit in a car.

$40, Sultan (aluminium legs, four pack)
They have cheaper ones that look cheaper, but I wanted the more expensive ones that look more expensive.

$10, Sultan (support leg) Dude said I needed one of these so I got one of these.

$59, delivery. This felt indulgent but how else was I supposed to get a box spring and mattress home? (No other way.) (At least no other way less money and hassle than $59.)

$10, delivery guy tip. I asked the lady at Ikea what is customary to tip their delivery people and she was like, IDK. When the guy came I momentarily wavered between a $10 bill I had and a $20 bill I had. And then I went with the $10 bill. Probably the wrong choice. He did carry a mattress and box spring up three flights of stairs by himself. Next time. (God let there never be a next time.) (There will be a next time.) (This is like the tenth bed I’ve bought how many more will I buy when will this end.)

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