Aren’t Related to Her, Haven’t Met Her, Don’t Love Her, But Choose Where She Lives

In contrast to yesterday’s heartwarming story, which made adopting a baby seem as easy as finding one on the subway and then saying “yes” when a judge asks you if you want to keep it, the blog Fosterhood shows how it actually works in our broken system (it doesn’t). Rebecca is on her fourth foster child and would have adopted any of them if given the chance. The latest outrage/heartbreak: She was contacted by the foster agency about adopting a baby; she met the birth parents, the birth parents approved, and chose her; she got a call when the baby was born, held her on her first day alive. She named the baby and the name she chose — including her last name — is on the birth certificate.

Child Services sent the baby to a different home. It’s been six days.

I’ve written about another fostering blog before, and Carrie, the foster mom to foster child Blitzen, wrote something that I keep revisiting. This is the system. This is how it works: “The home of Blitzen’s baby sibling, like the home of Blitzen herself, will be decided in an adversarial courtroom by people who aren’t related to her, haven’t met her and don’t love her.”

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