Hobbies Are Expensive (Fine by Me, Like I Care)

Expensive Hobbies I Can’t Afford But Wouldn’t Do Even if I Could

• Skiing (cold, gear, physical exertion)
• Snowboarding (same)
• Snorkeling (sharks)
• Scuba diving (sharks, the bends)
• Spelunking (just no)
• Sailing (seems complicated)
• Rock climbing (too much work, heights)
• Golfing (patience, walking)
• Scrapbooking (not a 40-year-old housewife)
• Cycling (sweat, machinery, carrying bikes up and down stairs)
• Horseback riding (poop)
• Flight lessons (crashes, no-fly zones, jet escorts)
• Art collecting (not a snob)
• Skydiving (parachute fails)
• Bowling (gross shoes)
• Backpacking/camping (dumb, hard, dirty)
• Rock band (gear)
• Pot throwing (messy)
• Pot growing (DEA, general garden upkeep)
• Procreation (literally everything about it)
• DIY (easier to buy)

Expensive Hobbies I Can’t Afford But Wish I Could, Okay, Yes

• Lazing (all day, nowhere to be, nothing to do)
• Sunbathing (private beach, island nation)
• Shopping (with abandon)
• Swimming (in far off bodies of water or own pool)
• Therapy (twice a week)
• Pilates (the one with the machines that basically work you out while you just sit there)
• Space travel (pack me a Xanax or twelve and I’m there)

Photo credit: flickr/girolame


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