The First Thing I Will Buy in 2017 Is A Robe

A nice start to what might be a pretty bad year.

Every morning after I shower but before I get dressed, I walk to my kitchen in my towel to make my breakfast. I put coffee in the coffeemaker, bread in the toaster and walk back to my room. If I lived alone, I would do this naked, probably, but out of respect for my roommates, I clutch my towel tightly around my body and do most of these preparations with one hand. It’s not the most efficient way of doing things, but it works for now. The other morning as I embarked upon this ritual, I realized that hey, it might be nice to not risk accidental nudity every morning. And so, the first thing I buy in 2017 will be a bathrobe.

One year I asked for a bathrobe for Christmas and I got one. Perhaps thinking that bathrobes were disposable items and not things you keep until they literally wear out, I threw it away after a year or so while purging my apartment in San Francisco before moving to New York. “Who needs a bathrobe,” I thought, probably, as I shoved it into a garbage bag and sent it to Goodwill. The answer to that question is me — I need a bathrobe.

I don’t know if the first thing you purchase in a new year signifies anything really, or if it sets an intention for the rest of the year and how it will go. In the years where I’ve been terrifically hungover, the first thing I’ve spent money on has usually been a bacon egg and cheese and a very large seltzer. But, in the past few years, I’ve realized that waking up hungover and feeling like death on the first day of the new year is a terrible way for a fresh start.

Purchasing a bathrobe, however, is both practical and indulgent — two qualities I look for in anything I chose to spend money on. Swathed in a robe, I will be able to walk around my house without flashing my roommates. I will be comfortable and so will they.

Is there any actual importance tied to the first purchase of a new year? Do you find that what you buy first in the new year influences the rest of your year at all? Am I imparting more meaning onto something that actually doesn’t mean anything? You tell me.

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