April Fools and Ant Infestations: A Friday Chat

“I have killed hundreds of ants this week, Nicole. It has been a great reign of terror.”

NICOLE: Happy Friday! Happy “thank goodness we aren’t doing April Fools garbage” day!

MEGHAN: Same to you! Fool me never, that’s my motto.

NICOLE: I think it’s kind of fascinating how internet culture has changed from “which website can do the best April Fools prank” to “NOBODY IS DOING THIS, IT IS NOT COOL ANYMORE, WE PROMISE WE WILL NOT FOOL YOU.”

MEGHAN: The one good decision the internet has made! What is this Google thing you were telling me about? I’ve been intentionally avoiding most of the world today out of fear.

NICOLE: So Google introduced a Gmail button called “Mic Drop.” If you pressed it, you’d immediately send the recipient this animated gif of a Minion dropping a microphone. It would also mute all replies from that recipient, because I guess that’s how a mic drop works; once the mic is dropped, you can no longer hear anyone talking to you.

Google disables April fool joke amid user fury after prank backfires

Except a lot of people woke up this morning, didn’t notice that there was a new button next to the “Send” button, and accidentally pressed it. Because Mic Drop mutes all replies, they had no idea. Apparently people accidentally Mic Dropped bosses, interviewers, and so on.

Yay April Fools!

MEGHAN: What a hilariously terrible idea! People were unintentionally pranking themselves! The world turned upside down! Ugh, I hate this holiday.

NICOLE: Hey, by the time this chat goes up, it’ll be that much closer to being over. So how is the rest of your Friday going?

MEGHAN: Well, I’ve decamped upstairs to my landlord’s (gorgeous) house today because my basement is being sprayed for ants. I have killed hundreds of ants this week, Nicole. It has been a great reign of terror. Everything is very fancy up here so I brought my own mug from downstairs and the cat keeps trying to eat my landlord’s orchids. It has been a day.

NICOLE: How did you end up in your landlord’s house? When my landlords have needed us to leave the apartment for maintenance reasons, I’ve always had to figure out my own accommodations.

MEGHAN: Well, my landlord is a colleague of my dad’s — that’s how I ended up in her basement, as she only rents it to people she knows. So she’s been extremely accommodating. Sometimes when I’m not home she and the cat have playdates, where she opens the door to the basement and lets him run up the stairs and sit on her kitchen counters. She’s handled the ant situation very well, actually — I really shouldn’t complain.

But that’s terrible, that they made you figure out where to hide out — is there or should there be some kind of renter’s provision for those kinds of situations?

NICOLE: There is the deal where, if the apartment isn’t inhabitable, the landlord will put you up at a hotel, and I’ve had that happen twice in my who-knows-how-many years of renting. (Eleven, I guess. Eleven years of renting.)

But I’m thinking more of the situation where you get the note under the door that reads “the water will be turned off during the day this week” or “we’re spraying for bugs but only during the day but maybe don’t be in the apartment while we’re spraying” and because I work from home, I have to find a place to be all day long. It also has to be a place where I can get work done. I generally end up bouncing back and forth between coffee shops and libraries.

MEGHAN: To be fair, this is the only place I’ve lived where the landlord also lived on the property. In previous rental situations, I’ve had pipes freeze, mouse infestations, major leaks, minor floods, and not once have I ever received anything beyond a shrug. This time I got marble countertops and an electric kettle!

It’s also one of the only times I’m relieved to be a renter, since the bug guy presented me with a $200 bill for the ant spray and I was able to say, oh, my landlord is taking care of that. NOT MY BUGS.

NICOLE: I know there are rental situations where the landlord would try to find out if they were your bugs, and charge you for it. Do you have any idea how the ant infestation happened?

MEGHAN: WHAT ARE YOU INSINUATING?!? They are not my ants! I’m assuming they are just garden variety basement ants? They are all very tiny and very persistent. I keep a very clean apartment — the bug guy even told me so! But I am considering also asking my landlady to pay for a cleaner to come, which feels rather ballsy.

Do you mean, like, if you brought the bugs in on a piece of furniture or something?

NICOLE: No, I was thinking more of my own experiences, where that note under the door reads “Dear Tenants, Unit 141 has bedbugs.” A previous landlord would absolutely name and shame the unit that (she assumed) started the problem.

And you should ask about a cleaner! Why not? How do you frame that kind of question, though? “Your bug guy left bug carcasses in my apartment and I’d like it fully cleaned?”

MEGHAN: “Your home is clearly riddled with filth and disease and I require you to do something about it.”? I think I might have to pony up for this one. Do you know how much a house cleaner typically costs? I’m extremely militant about cleaning but I’ve never hired anyone, as it just seemed like an extravagance. It still does, but maybe one I’m willing to indulge since I just spent three weeks watching ants carry other dead ants around my floor like a very sad ant parade.

NICOLE: Oh, you’ve got to get rid of the dead ants, or new ants will come back. This is something I learned when I was teaching at the University of Hyderabad. (That’s a long ant infestation story for another time.)

As for your question about housecleaning services, The Billfold has a number of articles on this very topic, from both the house cleaner’s and the customer’s perspective. I’d start here:

Support The Billfold

The Billfold continues to exist thanks to support from our readers. Help us continue to do our work by making a monthly pledge on Patreon or a one-time-only contribution through PayPal.