How Gilmore Girls Do Money: Michel Gerard

Gilmore Girls

“It should not surprise you,” Michel said, “that I have set aside a significant sum of money since we first began working together.”

“Uh-huh,” Lorelai said, scanning the guest book to see who would be arriving that afternoon.

“Ask me how much.”

“Okay, Michel. How much.”

“An uncountable sum.”

“Are you swimming in a pool of gold coins or something?” Lorelai asked. “Because last I checked, you can tap your phone and it’ll count your money for you.”

Michel raised his eyebrow. “You know how I feel about touching phones. It is like sticking your hand on a toilet.”

“Toilet’s cleaner.”

“You joke, but I am trying to tell you something important,” Michel said. “With this money, I am no longer in need of your employment.”

“Oh,” Lorelai said. Michel studied her, looking for the hint of sadness he knew would cross her face and smiling when he found it. “So two weeks then? Tell Sookie what kind of cake you want for your farewell party.”

“You know how I feel about cake.”

“Fine. Carrot sticks and a side of fresh air, whatever you want. I’m busy.”

Michel had been working with Lorelai long enough to know that she only pushed people away when she was really, really upset. His smile got even bigger.

“I am not announcing my retirement, even though I could, because I am rich now,” Michel said. “I am proposing an adjustment in my compensation and my responsibilities.”

He saw Lorelai start to smile, before she forced her face into what he and Sookie called “Boss Lady Look.”

“All right, Michel. Lay it on me.”

“I would like to become a more specialized concierge, focusing entirely on improving our guests’ experiences during their stay at the Dragonfly. As you know, I am more than qualified to recommend local theater, restaurants, and cultural opportunities.”

“Best restaurant is inside the Dragonfly, and I believe Kirk is putting on a one-man production of Pippin somewhere.”

“See?” Michel said. “You do not know. I will be the person who knows these things.”

“Okay. Specialized concierge. What else?”

“Since these duties will not consume an entire workday, I would like to reduce my hours. I will be available in the afternoons, to coincide with the majority of guest check-in times, and I will also hold weekly cultural conversations on Fridays before dinner.”

“Cultural conversations?”

“You know our guests enjoy talking with me,” Michel said.

“True enough,” Lorelai said. “I just never thought you enjoyed it.”

“In exchange, you may reduce my compensation by 75 percent.”

Lorelai slipped back into Boss Lady Look. “You know I should be leading the discussion on compensation adjustments…” Michel watched her do the math in her head. “But if that’s what you really want.”

Michel knew he had her, and he saw her face soften from Lorelai-his-boss to Lorelai-his friend. “What’s this really about, Michel?”

“Cameron and I are adopting a baby,” he said.

Michel saw that he had finally, for once in his life, rendered Lorelai speechless. Instead, she hugged him and—was this actually happening?—started jumping up and down.

“You will wrinkle my suit,” Michel said, but he started jumping up and down too.

Previously on How Gilmore Girls Do Money: Dean Forester

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