An Apple Watch Isn’t Cool. You Know What’s Cool? A GOLD Apple Watch

On June 1st, like millions of other somewhat foolish but fundamentally good
people who simply want a little reassurance in a world full of chaos, I checked my monthly horoscope (Cancer) at AstrologyZone.com. And, like millions of other folks, I was a bit taken aback to see that Susan Miller, guru to the masses, had Apple watches on the brain, writing, “I, for one, am not buying my new Apple watch until June 27.”

When I posted on Twitter about it, Guernica’s Lisa Lucas confirmed that a similar declaration had popped up in her horoscope too (Capricorn). Then Jezebel’s Emma Carmichael mentioned having the same experience, only in a lot more detail:

Well, so what? Susan Miller isn’t the only one excited about slapping a smaller version of an iPhone onto her wrist.

The coverage of the new smart-watch has been breathless for a while now but the intensity is ramping up as this technological beast slouches toward Bethlehem to be born. “Soon, You’ll Be Able To Buy An Apple Watch In An Apple Store,” announces the Washington Post. “About Time: Apple Watch to Hit Retail Stores June 26,” shouts Reuters. “Apple Watch Goes On Sale In Stores In TWO WEEKS,” blares the Daily Mail.

In case you need reminding, here is the current hierarchy of options:

Apple Watch is available in three collections, Apple Watch Sport, priced at $349 (US) and $399 (US); Apple Watch, available from $549 (US) to $1,099 (US); and Apple Watch Edition, crafted from custom rose or yellow 18-karat gold alloys, with prices starting at $10,000 (US).

Customers who purchase from Apple will be offered Personal Setup, in-store or online, to customize and pair Apple Watch with their iPhone, showing them new apps from the App Store for Apple Watch and more. Customers can explore and choose their favorite Apple Watch in the Apple Online Store (www.apple.com) or through the Apple Store app for iPhone and iPad®.

Apple Watch requires iPhone 5, iPhone 5c, iPhone 5s, iPhone 6 or iPhone 6 Plus running iOS 8.2 or later.

Say you want something … more, though. Something a little different. Special. Say you want the gold, because you want people to understand you’re high status, but you don’t want to pay $10K for it, because you also want people to understand you’re savvier than the average plebe. Are there any options for you?

Why, yes. Yes there are:

Instead of spending over $10,000 on a golden Apple Watch Edition why not use the Midas Touch USB, a DIY kit that uses electrochemistry to plate your boring old steel Apple Watch with 24 karat gold. Unlike the posers who have just painted the watch gold, this process actually chemically binds 24 karat gold to the stainless steel surface. The kit currently requires a stainless steel Apple Watch, but a new process to coat the Sport is in the works.

Chemist Eric Knoll created the kit after hearing about the pricing for the Edition model. His goal was to make a gold version more affordable for the average Apple customer. The project is already fully funded and product will ship soon. While the chemical process is rather complicated, Knoll has broken the procedure down into 3 easy to understand DIY steps.

Perhaps this is a good moment to plug this piece about the hidden costs of DIY. And, perhaps, to quote my favorite moments from the 1994 cinematic mediocrity that was Forrest Gump:

“Lieutenant Dan got me invested in some kind of fruit company. So then I got a call from him, saying we don’t have to worry about money no more. And I said, that’s good! One less thing.”

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