WINTER IS COMING Time to Watch Some Movies

As you may be aware, winter has come early this year. Our country is in the grip of a weather pattern shaped like an Omega, which portends the End of Everything. What can we do? Nothing, really. Hold your loved ones. Batten down the hatches. And watch Oscar-baity films.

Mike saw Interstellar over the weekend and (thanks to a friend who volunteered to babysit!!) my dude and I saw Birdman, which felt like the movie you’d get if you put David Mamet and Mel Brooks in a room and gave them plenty of hallucinogens. Still, funny! And Ed Norton was amazing.

Mike and I discussed our respective experiences.

ESTER: So Interstellar is not worth full price, huh?

MIKE: Hah, no. It was like a dumb M. Night Shyamalan movie.

ESTER: Birdman was also flawed and weird but fun.

MIKE: Luckily I had these AMC passes that never expire. Because I would have been so mad to pay $18 for it. $18!!!! I remember your passes, but yours are like from the ’90s. And people are like, what are these?

ESTER: hahahhaha. They’re from the early 00s, I’ll have you know.

MIKE: Lol. You know, just like a decade old. Your tickets could be like, in the 4th grade now.

ESTER: Have you ever been to Nitehawk? It’s so much fun.

MIKE: Lol, no. That is quite a commute to go see a movie. I mean, I have a theater two blocks from me, plus Lincoln Center is not too far.

ESTER: Yeah but does your theater serve food and drink? Like to you INSIDE THE THEATER? And give you a cute little table to eat at? Basically what I’m saying is the theater made the movie better.

MIKE: My theater is reserved seating so you don’t have to get there early. Plus, leather recliners. That was my favorite part of Interstellar: sitting in the theater. Especially since it was 3 hours.

ESTER: ok that is nice. They do that in civilized countries. I don’t get to go to the movies much anymore so when I do it’s kind of nice for it to be a whole Moviegoing Experience.

MIKE: Also, I’m at a point in my life where I’ll buy a soda and popcorn and don’t care so much that it’s $11? I guess they have to stay in business somehow.

ESTER: Well, yeah, but like you said, you had a free pass.

MIKE: Yes, and the free pass helps.

ESTER: My oldskool free passes *come* with popcorn, btw.

MIKE: What a time the early ’00s were!

ESTER: Those fresh-faced, bright-eyed, youthful times. Full of energy and optimism and low prices. If you could buy real food, like dinner, would you prefer to do that, or do you actually like going the overpriced popcorn route?

MIKE: Um, I mean, I love popcorn, but it’s not dinner. Or it shouldn’t be 🙂

ESTER: Heh. Yeah. That’s nice about Nitehawk, that you can get dinner while you eat your movie. It feels like being at a drive in. Although there was something sharp/funny in my salad, and I had to spit it out in my napkin, and because the lights were off, I couldn’t see what it was.

MIKE: Um.

ESTER: If I had been at a real restaurant, I could have dealt with it; but because I was watching a movie at the same time, I was just kind of like, “Eh, whatever, I’m sure they didn’t MEAN to try to kill me.”

MIKE: “Eh, whatever just eating razor blades in the dark.”

ESTER: Exactly. $10 razor blades. Well, razor blades are expensive …

Even without paying for babysitting, our exciting evening out came with a relatively hefty price tag for the dude and me:

+ Cab to Williamsburg, because when a friend agrees to babysit there’s no time to put yourself at the mercy of the maybe-it’ll-come-or-maybe-it-won’t G train: $20 plus tip

+ Tickets: $11 each plus $2 service charge = $24

+ Food at the theater: salad (luckily not fatal) $10, pumpkin quesadilla $9, fish tacos $15, housemade mint lemonade $4, plus tip = $45

+ Cab home so friend can get to her party on time: $20 plus tip

TOTAL EXPENDITURE FOR TWO PARENTS TO GET OUT OF THE HOUSE, EAT REAL FOOD, AND SEE BIRDMAN: $113. And I’d basically say it was worth it.

Support The Billfold

The Billfold continues to exist thanks to support from our readers. Help us continue to do our work by making a monthly pledge on Patreon or a one-time-only contribution through PayPal.