Apocalyptic Sensibilities

by Mike Dang and Logan Sachon

Logan:: I keep watching the gif of that meteor in Russia and thinking about how I would totally and completely lose my mind if I had seen that with my eyeballs in real life. Well maybe not totally. But … yeah probably basically totally.

Mike: I wouldn’t know what to make of it either. Just close my eyes and hope it doesn’t destroy everything I know and love. But there’s also not a lot you can do about it, either.

Logan:: That gif reminds me of a day last summer. I was in a garden store in Red Hook and I looked up at the sky and there were like, five equidistant contrails, and my immediate thought was: Oh. Those are nuclear warheads coming from somewhere, going to somewhere. And I kept staring at them, and thinking about where they would be going, and they weren’t going here probably, so they must be going to D.C. or maybe to a military base, like, I don’t know, the biggest one, and my family is all over both of those places and so I’m standing there and staring at the sky and thinking that everyone I love is about to dead and there’s nothing I can do about anything. And then my friend Amy came over and just nodded up and she was like, “What.” And I was like, “Amy.” Very grave. Because you know, I thought it was endtimes. And she was like, “Yeah, those are skywriters.” And they were. “Mohegan Sun for Summer Fun.” The world didn’t end. But that’s what the meteor reminded me of! MYSELF. A thing that actually didn’t even happen to me once! I’m a catastrophist. And a narcissist. We’ve talked about this.

Mike: Right — I think I’ve said that you’ve had an “apocalyptic sensibility.” Which you do! For me, I see those things — these meteor fragments destroying buildings and injuring people — and although it feels a little helpless, it doesn’t make me change the way I live my life any differently. Does it for you? (i.e. “Who cares if I spend a lot on dinner tonight — it could be my last before I’m hit by meteor fragments!”)

Logan:: Yeah, I guess it kind of does. Not so explicit, but I think death and the imminence of death and possibility of it coming anytime, in any way, doesn’t so much make me feel like this could be the last day (though it could be!), as, well, just sort of more laissez faire about things working out. Like: I think things will work out. Even if that just means you’re dead. That’s one way of them working out. I’ve thought every plane I’ve ever been on was going to crash, but I always have this moment of acceptance — it’s been a good run, kid. (Sorry I’m still staring at this gif. Distracted.)

Mike: Right, and you have to balance that with the idea of, “Well, what if this day doesn’t turn out to be my last?” Think of: all those people who listened to Harold Camping about “End-Times” and who got rid of their belongings only to wake up the day after the world was supposed to end. I guess I wouldn’t spend all my money even if we were all convinced the world was going to end. “In-case-of-world-not-ending” money.

Logan:: Yes it’s important to be prepared for all scenarios, which: Ha. I’m prepared for only one scenario, and that is …. for things to stay cool and calm. Do you read prepper blogs? I don’t with regularity, but I like to binge now and then, and during those binges, I always decide that I need to be a prepper.

Mike: Hah. I don’t read prepper blogs! I just feel like there’s no way to really prep for a meteor fragment crashing into you. And if we do get to a point where it’s like The Road, well, hopefully I won’t survive for that.

Logan:: No you can’t prep for a meteor crashing into you, duh! But you can prep for a meteor taking out food supplies or whatever. Whatever! When I choke on a peppermint or get hit by a car, I hope someone stands up, and is like, “Lol, remember how much time she spent thinking about the world ending?” But here’s the thing! I don’t think it’s all bad. Like, a little perspective is good. Space rocks breaking the sound barrier. That happened. It happened more than once. Dinosaurs used to exist! Perspective. And I can’t spend all my money on a meteor dinner because I already spent all my money on living. Beans and rice tonight. (Prepped.) Back to the gif. Bye.

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