The Evolution of Understanding How to Get a Job

1.
Kids don’t think about jobs, what is a job.

2.
If you wanted a job, you just got it. Like say if you wanted to be a doctor, you just grew up and then you were one. Manifest destiny.

3.
Job fairs. You have to print your resume on nice paper with a watermark. Wear sensible shoes and black pants. Smile. Firm handshake.

4.
Monster dot com.

5.
Craigslist. No attachments!! Personalize your cover letter, show your enthusiasm. And refresh all the time because you have to be in like, the first ten to apply or forget about it.

6.
You stalk people on the internet and then ask them for informational interviews and then you meet them for coffee and they’re so impressed with you they give you a job.

7.
Okay forget Craigslist. It’s all about specialized job boards. They hide the jobs so only the best people can find them. Look harder!!

8.
Make your resume POP! Use those InDesign Skills. Add visual elements. Make your personality shine through. Vamp up your cover letter. Shine on. Consider a sexier font.

9.
Make your cover letter really boring. Use only language in the job ad. Undesign your resume. It’s a numbers game. Apply to everything.

10.

Who do you know that can give you a job. Who. Think harder.

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