My Last Hundred Bucks: Hamptons Edition
by Sarah Salovaara

Where’d your last hundo go, Sarah Salovaara?
Last weekend, my ex-boyfriend and I went to his family’s house in the Hamptons because I take pride in maintaining relationships past their expiration date. Note: We never did this as a couple.
$5: Roadies.
$30: A one-way ticket on the Jitney. Goldfish, water, lemonade, pretzels, woman who asks stranger in the seat next to her to unzip her dress down to her underwear because she is “sweltering”: all included, free of charge.
$16: Cab from the bus station that we shared with several dead raccoons. Or perhaps that was just the flavor of the air freshener dangling from the rearview mirror.
$0: A screening of Prince Avalanche. As soon as the lights came up, my ex and I agreed we were thrilled we did not have to pay for a ticket.
$9.75: Moose tracks and mocha chip ice cream in a waffle cone. Yes, that’s one cone for ~ten dollars, not two. Dessert before dinner don’t come cheap.
$5: Egg and cheese on a roll and a cup of joe at the local general store.
$26.99: The Flamethrowers. Though my ex worked at the bookstore during his summer breaks, it appeared his employee discount was null and void. I’d heard enough to wager it was worth the splurge. (It is.)
$7.50: A train ticket from Jamaica to Penn Station. The ticket collectors were so disturbed by the boardy barn hooligans in our car that they forgot to ring us up pre-transfer. Savings: $12.25. Whether it was worth listening to 20 wasted Nassau man-children slurring and screaming Ludacris lyrics for an hour: questionable.
Sarah Salovaara lives in New York.
Support The Billfold
The Billfold continues to exist thanks to support from our readers. Help us continue to do our work by making a monthly pledge on Patreon or a one-time-only contribution through PayPal.
Comments